Sink or Swim: A Parenting Moment That Hit Me Deeper Than I Expected

A few months ago, we were staying at our friend’s place in Westlake Village. It was early in our process of selling everything we owned to travel full-time for the next year or so. That night, I went to bed early and Colin and his friend took Elodie outside to enjoy the hot tub overlooking the lake.

If you know Elodie, you see this girl lives for water. Hot tubs, lakes, oceans, pools—you name it, she’s in.

We’d done what we thought was the “right” thing before our trip: survival swim classes. She was just under two, and we thought, if she ever fell in, she’d know what to do.

Well… not exactly.

This hot tub was deeper than ours, custom-built, and had a drop-off in the middle. Confident and fearless, Elodie stepped off the ledge and sank straight to the bottom.

And Colin, like many good dads trying to trust the process, waited for a moment. He wanted to see if she’d kick, float, or swim. She didn’t.
So he pulled her out.

And didn’t tell me until the next morning. (SMART!)

I was shocked.

Sick to my stomach.

But once the nerves wore off and the adrenaline faded, the lesson hit me in a whole different way.

Sometimes, life throws you into the deep end, not to drown you, but to test whether you’ve really learned how to swim.

We prepare

We take the classes

Buy the gear

Read the books

Rehearse the speeches

We feel confident. Ready.

But when it really matters… will you float? Will you fight for air? Will you swim?

Or will you realize you still need support, more practice, more tools, more truth?

Since that day, we’ve doubled down on swim lessons. She’s currently in classes again while we visit family in Pittsburgh, and we’ll keep going until she’s strong enough to swim anywhere.

But the metaphor hasn’t left me.

There have been moments in my life, and definitely in business, where I’ve sunk. To the bottom.
Times when I thought I was ready, only to find out I wasn’t.

But every time, I learned. I adjusted. I asked for help. I rebuilt the skills. I worked my way back to floating, and eventually, I swam.

It takes a village to help a child stay afloat. And it takes a village to keep us afloat, too. In life, in motherhood, in work.

I shared a lighthearted photo from this day on Instagram and Facebook, a sweet shot of Elodie on a paddleboard.
But that post only told the surface story.

This is what really happened. And it changed me.

Confidence is beautiful, but misplaced confidence can be dangerous.
It’s not enough to believe you can swim. You have to know it.

I’m grateful this moment ended the way it did. But it taught me that watching from a distance isn’t the same as being prepared. And sometimes, even if you’re not there physically, the impact of a moment can shift your whole perspective.

If you’ve ever had an experience that changed you, even though you weren’t the one in the room, I’d love for you to share it in the comments.
The “fork in the road” moments.

The ones that shake you.

The ones that make you stronger.

Thanks for reading my heart today.
💛

Xo,

Danielle Victoriah