You Don’t Need to Feel Small to Be Loved
This one hits me a little differently. As a 6-foot-tall woman, dating was hard for years. I felt taller and bigger than 99% of the population and I’m probably not wrong.
I met my husband when I was 31. Most of the men I dated before him were at least 3–6 inches shorter than me… and honestly, I didn’t care. I chose men who didn’t care either. But it took me a long time to get there.
I worked hard to stand up straight, wear heels, and stop shrinking myself. (Fun fact: men between 5’11 and 6’2 always seemed to struggle with my height. Weirdly enough, shorter guys or much taller guys didn’t care at all. )
Here are three things that helped me stop feeling “too big” in dating:
Exercise + confidence. Nothing screams confidence like feeling strong and comfortable in your own body.
Reframing the stares. When people looked at me in heels, I stopped assuming they thought I was “too much” and started seeing it as curiosity. They didn’t see women my height every day.
Surrounding myself with the right women. Women who made me feel seen, heard, and valued. The kind of support that reminds you your worth goes way beyond the physical.
I wasn’t going to miss out on someone amazing because of a height difference. That wouldn’t have been fair, to me or to them.
If you’re curious about having more conversations like this while dating, pull up a chair and join us.
xo,
Danielle Victoriah